Tetris Movie in Production

If you scroll down for some time, you may find a post saying that I will no longer report movie news. However, this story is so bizarre that I feel like I have to comment on it.

It has been announced this week that the the classic video game Tetris will be made into a movie. For anybody unfamiliar with the game, it involves tiles of different shapes falling to the bottom of the screen. The player must move the tiles before they reach the bottom in a way in which they stack up without getting too tall. And that's the whole game. There is no story, no characters, just tiles that don't resemble anything.

I'm confused. How do you make a movie about that?

So far, there are no details about the plot of the movie, but it is supposed to be a live action sci-fi movie. Because an animated Tetris movie wasn't stupid enough, apparently.

The movie is being made by Threshold Entertainment. This company is the same that bought us the movie versions of Mortal Kombat. They also made a film called Foodfight, which was about the adventures of many food mascots, was sent straight to DVD despite it's large production value, and received very negative reviews. Larry Kasanoff, the CEO of Threshold, when talking about the movie said that "brands are the new stars of Hollywood." That is such a cynical statement.

I have seen people online compare this to the Battleship movie we've had a few years back, but I don't think that is an appropriate comparison. This make even less sense than Battleship. While there was no story or characters behind the Battleship game, it at least allowed for a movie about battleships. But Tetris is about simply a bunch of tiles that fall to the ground. How are you going to make a movie about that? Like any movie at all?

This is the most ridiculous attempt at Hollywood trying to cash in on a brand I think I have ever seen. I don't see any way that they can make this movie any good. It's almost insulting to fans of other games who want to see movie versions of them. You wanted to see that game with the deep story get a movie adaptation? Well they aren't making it, but their making a film out of a game with no story or theme! What has the world come to?

Source: http://www.newyorker.com/culture/culture-desk/tetris-movie